Relationships Matter

When couples turn to therapy or to self-help, they are usually looking for a way to "fix" their "problem." Common solutions might entail improving communication skills, identifying unproductive interaction patterns, or changing some specific behaviors.

When a couple steps into the work of Bert Hellinger, the partners are entering a realm of uncommon solution. Hellinger's approach -- family constellations and the underlying observations from which they take shape -- taps into the deepest dynamics of a relationship. People begin to see just how unseen forces, including non-present family members and those of past generations, and the choices that were made long ago, affect the current partners' connections with each other at many different levels.

Supporting Love presents verbatim transcripts of constellations with numerous couples, supplemented by questions, commentary, and discussion, to bring this multidimensional process into focus. Typically, a constellation moves through two stages. In the first, hidden -- yet compelling -- influences on the family are revealed. In the second phase, healing movements and statements are discovered -- or recovered -- and then tested within the constellation. The "psychic adjustment" that takes place, whether great or small, expands the couple's vocabulary in creating solution.

Bert Hellinger's voice is clear and strong on such topics as love, suffering, bonding, giving and taking, parenthood, childlessness, faithfulness, separation, and sexuality. Throughout the book, there are moments of exquisite clarity and moments of uneasy surprise: the resonance and discord of new insights into the ways we can support love -- and the ways that love can support us.

User Reviews about Supporting Love : How Love Works in Couple Relationships

This book is wonderful. Hellinger tells it as he sees it, and his integrity is as impeccable as his vision. A deeply transforming exploration of the origins and endings of suffering in love relationships. -- The Definitive Book for any couple begotten of parents

I bought the book because it promised no 'quick-fixes'. I wanted something worth thinking about and this book gave me just that. Profound and emotional truths. I always felt a presence of my extended family in my relationships and so the concept of the constellations intrigued me. Having never done one, I am still a bit skeptical. However, the book is not just that. Bert Gellinger has an unbelievably accurate insight into relationships. I found myself reading his deceptively simple truths and a little light would go on because the concepts seem to verbalize ideas I've known to be true, but never articulated. These concepts alone make the book invaluable.

Additionally, it's a quick read - it's not bogged down with psycho babble. It's direct and thought provoking. -- Deceptively simple truths

This is Bert Hellinger's best book ( I read them all) but you cannot really go wrong with any of them. I recommend this reading to everyone (even if this is something new for you). His method is a life changing experience. Going through the Family Constellation make one's life easier and filled with much more love for oneself and others. How it all works is wonderfully explained in this book. -- A great choice