Relationships Matter

Secret Suffering: How Women's Sexual and Pelvic Pain Affects Their Relationships is the first book to explain how pelvic and sexual pain affects the lives of women (and men) and their partners in their own words/ The work also provides information on cutting-edge research and describes the most effective treatment modalities. Susan Bilheimer, coauthor, shares her own experiences as a patient who has gone down the painful, frustrating road of living with an illness that is often dismissed and not taken seriously. Robert J. Echenberg, M.D., coauthor, has treated over 700 women (and some men) with the disorder. He shares his decades of experience and expertise as a gynecologist and specialist in the treatment of chronic pelvic pain.

Not only does CPP interfere with a woman's physical and mental health, it can wreak havoc in family relationships, ruin careers, and wreck marriages. In the majority of cases, women suffer in silence. Even when they do seek medical help, what they find too often is inadequate care, as most doctors, even gynecological specialists, are not properly trained in recognizing, much less treating, all aspects of CPP.

Through classic, new, and emerging research, with statements from experts and interviews with CPP sufferers and their partners, Secret Suffering exposes and gives strong voice and compassionate understanding to this complex disorder. Most importantly, information on effective treatments for CPP, as well as the depression and other psychological fallout it may cause, are presented. Through Secret Suffering, Bilheimer and Echenberg finally shatter the silence, educate patients, build understanding, and demand that chronic pelvic and genital pain be taken seriously by the medical community.

User Reviews about Secret Suffering: How Women's Sexual and Pelvic Pain Affects Their Relationships (Sex - Love - and Psychology)

As I began reading Secret Suffering I found myself able to identify with each and every topic. I have been a patient for almost 28 years which I feel qualifies me to say that this book is right on target when it comes to the emotional and physical aspects of chronic pelvic pain. I admit I cried through some of the chapters but, at the same time I felt as if it was speaking to me personally saying "You're not alone" and "You have the right to be heard"! I also loved that the authors explain the differences between male and female's way of problem solving and difference between the way we think. It told me to stop assuming and to start asking my partner how he feels. A huge burden was lifted and I learn the true meaning of intimacy. Secret suffering gives the reader a look into the reality of pelvic pain which can be a bit heart wrenching but at the same time very educational. If you're living in denial, if you're feeling guilty about not being able to have spontaneous sex with your partner, if you feel your family doesn't believe you or doctor is far from compassionate I recommend that you read this book.

Gloria Prater, Patient
-- Secret Suffering How Women's Sexual and Pelvic Pain Affects Their Relationships

I have suffered from chronic pelvic pain for almost 30 years. Even though my family is aware of my health problems, until I read this book, "Secret Suffering", by Dr. Echenberg & Susan Bilheimer, I felt like I was going through this all alone. This book encompasses underlying causes for pain, & treatments that are available, but most important to my healing experience- it gave me faith that there are doctors out there who do believe & want to help us,... & the overwhelming feeling of relief that can only come from sharing experiences of those who suffer like me. If you or someone you know has this type of medical problem, educate yourself, seek treatment, don't give up- & READ THIS BOOK. It MIGHT NOT make the pain go away.... but it WILL make you feel better :-) -- Finally someone understands.

Finally a book that lets people in on how much pelvic pain can and does affect not only the sufferer, but her or his partner...I have several chronic pelvic diseases, and have read just about every book I can find about pelvic pain; the difference is that this book is co-written by a woman who herself is a "secret sufferer"; and having a doctor co-author covers "all the bases". Another thing that is exceptional about this book is the people with the problems give first person accounts, and their partners also relate how they are affected; making this a great book to share with one's significant other. Personally for me, while I have a very supportive husband, there are times I feel alone in my suffering. This book lets you know you are not alone and there is hope out there. -- Finally...