Relationships Matter

Asperger Syndrome (AS) has often been considered to be incompatible with love and relationships, but as the number of diagnoses increases, it is becoming apparent that people with AS can and do have full and intimate relationships. Maxine Aston frankly examines the fundamental aspects of relationships that are often complicated by the disorder. Illustrated with real-life examples, the book tackles issues such as attraction, trust, communication, intimacy and parenting and includes a section on frequently asked questions, making it a must for all those with AS and their partners, as well as for friends, family and counselors.

User Reviews about Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs

Amazing! This book was as if she captured my entire failed dating and marriage issues. I regret that I didn't read this earlier. I am hopeful that one day someone would be willing to read this and join me in this journey. -- Aspergers In Love

I am an adult female with Asperger's Syndrome. When my relationship started demonstrating obvious issues with communication, I wanted to get a good idea of how the Asperger's Syndrome might be affecting it. This book was recommended, so I picked it up. On the positive, the book is packed with information and ideas on where a relationship might break down. As other reviews have said, it IS thought provoking and insightful.

However, that said, I was actually quite disappointed with the book. The book is not critical of the AS individual but the tone of the writing stops just shy of that and most of all, this book doesn't seem applicable at all to a relationship between an AS female and anyone NT or otherwise.

There is a tone that NT people sometimes take when referring to the behavior of a person with AS. It's a mixture of the condescending 'poor AS person, they don't know how to feel properly' and a bit of clinical detachment. I was dismayed to find the author writing with that tone. So while the NT reading it might feel like they've found a source that gives voice to what they are experiencing, it (ironically) does little to foster actual empathy with the AS person and their actions. As a woman with AS, who was looking for valuable input, I was really put off by it.

I made it through most of the book with a really puzzled look on my face looking for that one paragraph that would make me able to relate - REALLY relate to the AS traits she describes. And then I got to the ONE chapter about AS Women in the back of the book - and EUREKA! I was able to relate to this chapter! At the beginning of this chapter about AS Women, there is a tiny explanation about how writing the book using the words 'AS Male' simply made the book more comprehensible. But really? Because I could relate to so much of that one chapter and so little of the rest of the book, I wonder, truly, how much of the rest of the book even applies to a majority of women with AS. And while, perhaps AS women just wasn't the focus of the book, it's billed as a book about being in a relationship with AS individuals in general - and it's not. It's actually a book about relationships between an AS Male and an NT Female with a footnote about AS Women.

PS : Asperger's has an apostrophe in it... a possessive noun in order to denote the person who is credited with first studying the syndrome. For an author who is credited as being 'uniquely placed to write this book', you'd think the title of the book would be spelled correctly.
-- Read with a Grain of Salt Held Firmly in Hand

Having been diagnosed with AS I have been reading many books on the subject. I found this one the best so far. My wife also found the book beneficial and it has helped us to understand why we see things differently in some situations and how this impacts on our interactions. -- Best book I've found on AS yet

I was really looking for a book that was directed toward helping an adult with Asperger's navigate through romantic relationships. This book was more focused on helping the neurotypical understand an Aspie mate. I think it was helpful for those readers in the latter category, but not really what I was looking for. -- Somewhat helpful